You were an awesome dad !

I have to say this today that I am now in love with my present. I am loving the station at which I have arrived. I have that sense of satisfaction within. I am happy. I am filled with peace. 

So, what do I attribute to this state? I think the real achievement has been the remarkable discoveries that I made about life in these past 9 years that I have lived. 

And it all began with handling the biggest crises that occurred in my life. It was the loss of my father. It was just beyond my comprehension when it occurred to me. It was something that I didn’t even wish to imagine. I used to be afraid that I might lose my parents. And I knew that they would not go at the same time. Even then I never wanted to accept it. 

I think none of us really can prepare for such a loss. All that we can do probably begins after the loss. So it was for me. I slipped into mental pain and trauma. I started to feel the huge amount of emptiness that I experienced after his passing away. I did not know how to react or respond. I had become numb. 

It was only after a year or two that I started to make sense out of it. And that’s when I realised that even though his body left the world but his soul stayed with me. And I started to experience the awakening of his soul within me. I know he deeply loved me. He loved me unconditionally. 

I can say this because when someone loves you they respect your freedom. He always allowed me that space to grow and be anything that I wanted to be. He had only one thing to say: do whatever you do but find excellence in it. Don’t just do the things. Do it the way that you are on top of the cream. 

It could be anything. Not just your career or studies or work. It could be your relationships. It could be about self care. It could be about being honest and with integrity. He always asked me to have a good and strong character. And I can proudly say that I have been very very lucky to have a father like him. I couldn’t ever find a better hero. 

I love him more today because I understand him more today than I used to while I was a kid. Wise people have wisely remarked that you can not assess greatness in a person  until you have been in that role. And being a father today, I can understand what a privilege it had been to be born out of his blood. 

My father today is the most endearing person I can think of. Maybe I know him more than anyone else I would know as a father. And the best thing is that I know what kind of person would make a great father. Probably this will make my work easier on how I should be to my kids. 

From his legacy that he has left behind, I can say that a person to be great in any role must be a great person first of all. A great person is a person with values, with dreams, with integrity, with commitment, with love, with regards for others etc. 

A great person thinks about others before he could think of himself. He thinks of his family. He thinks of his country. He thinks of his fellowmen. And he thinks of himself capable of everything. That’s what he asked me to be. To be capable of everything. Believe. Dream. 

Though he worked in small roles, he always made me dream big. Unfortunately, I failed to comprehend the depth of his ideas while he was around. I would end up judging him more by his economic and social achievements. How stupid it was to overlook his grand vision.  I think I wasn’t capable enough to really comprehend his greatness. But the greatness in his ideas, in his vision, in his dreams is being revealed to me as I engage myself more and more and immerse myself into the thoughts he has passed on to me as legacy. 

While I never understood how he could ever pass on a rich legacy as long as he himself wasn’t rich enough. But now I fully realise what he meant when he said that he was giving me more precious things than material wealth. He always promised and delivered the best samskaras to me. And due to them, I am still growing and aiming high today. 

He was the spiritual powerhouse. I often wonder how he could gather so much wisdom while he kept himself tied up with family, work and his commitment towards society. I think he simply understood that being human meant everything. No amount of formal education will ever equal the education package he delivered in his lifetime of 57 years out of which I had the honour to witness the last 37 years. 

Dad, I can go on and write a book upon you. Or maybe I am starting off on that mighty project, who knows. For the time being, I want to sum it up with just saying that : you were an awesome dad.